Beautiful God

What a beautiful God we serve.

I don't understand His greatness. I say He is awesome but I really have no idea.
I think about Peter and how they were going to crucify him and he didn't even think of himself worthy enough to die the same way that Christ died. His death was already going to be EXTREMELY painful but still he asked his executioners to hang him upside down. That really shows me how I have narrowed my thinking so much. My world can be so small.

God, I don't know what to say. Thank you.

I want to be there...

Reaching Out As He Works Within

Before I went to write this post I went around reading others and I found it interesting that everything I read I could relate to in some way or another, especially one written by Alexis. It was about finding the balance between working on your personal issues and also your relationship with Christ and then reaching out to others to help them. I had been thinking about that lately because I know if I were to take time for all of my issues and try to sort them all out that would take my whole life and would be pretty selfish. I was praying yesterday and I remember feeling kind of overwhelmed because I have so much junk. I see how I fall short in so many areas. And the cool thing was that I felt God say "It's ok, don't worry about it just lay it down." I love that. And not only does He allow us to drop all of our struggles at His feet, but He replaces it with love. It's that love that He gives me and that mercy that motivates me to reach out to others. Its a beautiful thing, we love because He first loved us... Everything is always a win-win. Christ loves us, we love others and get to see lives change and fruit come forth. Seek first the Kingdom...
Although this doesn't really tie in with all that here is a cool little story from my day: Earlier I was feeding Grace and it was clear that she was very tired but as she always does she fought going to sleep. Eventually when she did fall asleep I put her in her crib but within a couple minutes she woke up and I was already downstairs and by the time I went back up she was screaming (to clear things up, her waking up two minutes after going to sleep and screaming is not the norm with her) so I picked her up and after a while I started singing as she continued to cry but then I started singing, "The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases, His mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning, new every morning. Great is thy faithfulness oh, God. Great is thy faithfulness." and she immediately stopped crying and fell asleep. It was pretty amazing because it really was immediately. I stopped and thought about it for a minute because one, it was strange that I even started singing that song because I haven't heard it in so long and two, because I wondered why it calmed her so quickly. Thinking about the words of that song made me cry. I was just like, wow. God is so good. He is so good to Grace, that He is her comfort and cares for her so much. And He is so good to all of us. Great is thy faithfulness...

John 15:9

As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you. Now remain in my love.

God is with us

It wasn't untill I came back from Guatemala that I really began to see all that the LORD was doing in me while I was there. For a while before we left I felt somewhat numb. I rarely cried, my laughs wern't as sincere as I would have liked them to be. Its all kind of silly but that stuff is important to me. But now, I can feel again! Every morning God had me waking up early (or as Sarah would say "before the sun") to spend time with Him. That was a discipline and a pleasure that I really needed. I would look out and there were mountains as far as I could see. Talk about BIG! It was so easy to understand more of God's glory because my vision wasn't limited to man-made surroundings. It was the most incredible thing I've seen. The crazy thing was that even while we were there though I had some struggles and I believe I was reaping what I had sown before the trip. In worship I felt so distracted towards the beggining of the trip. We all came together one night and were totally transparent and I shared that basically saying I can't believe I feel this way on a missions trip! But God was gracious as He brought me into a deeper place with Him despite me coming a bit unprepared. The best thing about all this is that the God who I came close to on the mountain top is the same God that lives in my heart. God always proves Himself faithful and for that I am eternally grateful. =]

Guatemala

This is a semi-difficult post to write because there is so much I could say I don't know where to begin...
Six of us just got back on Sunday from a missions trip to Guatemala. As soon as we arrived at the project we were greeted by some people and then the next day more people. People I had never even met were hugging me and welcoming me as if I wern't a stranger. It was hard for me to actually believe where I was. We walked up the mountain to San Diego (it was incredibly difficult by the way...) and in our view we could see villages, volcanoes, and lots of mountains. I basically just cried during our time of prayer. Everyone there just blew me away. During church they are active in worship and prayer. Any time the pastor would pray I could see or hear others praying along or crying and it was the most beautiful thing to watch. They all know each other there and its not as if they don't get in arguements or anything but they treat each other with such love. They are a family. I could probably say something about every person that I met there and how I learned something from them whether it was to be content with little or serve when nobody notices. I am absolutley amazed. I know this is somewhat brief but I'll be sure to write more on my next post as I know I will not forget about this trip.
God is so beautiful and I'm praying we will all be eternally changed by that trip or from ones to come.

Life is good

I would like to say that I'm pretty real when it comes to me and God but today was different. I went to the House of Prayer just feeling so desperate for more and I started writing out my prayers and I felt like I was just releasing so much to God. I know that God puts desires inside of me but I don't always go about them the right way. Sometimes I leave Christ out of the picture. That's not ok with me anymore and thats why today He was showing me that He wants to walk through things with me. He wants to share my joy and even my pain.
My life is hidden with Christ.
I love the feeling of having so much joy and knowing that that makes my God happy. Thats like triple the joy! I don't really mind if this doesn't make sense but I am so in love with God.